after sunset, London / 日落之後，倫敦

我一直在等一個點，等我心裡的泡沫都散去，我就可以沉澱，今天早晨起來的確有種「可以了」的感覺。

I'd been waiting for a point, when all the foams on the surface of my heart lost zest. Then I'd be able to get down to the ground. This morning when I got up, I did have the confidence that I was ready to do more than blogging today. 

上個星期和我同一天出發的包裹也順利抵達，想到裡面有我念念不忘的硯台，終於可以寫書法，心裡不禁安定下來。

The package that had set out on the same date as I finally arrived. On thinking that there is the ground ink stand inside, I felt soothed by the idea that I can sit down to write calligraphy. 

本來以為今天也就這麼平凡但踏實地過了，但我今日的倫敦響導J帶著我進行一段很特別的旅行，有點「愛在巴黎日落前」的風格。J是所有接待我的新朋友中，最踏實最仔細也最照顧人的第一名，大部份人多半和我吃頓飯聊聊天，而J從我來之前便詢問需不需要去機場接我，來之後不斷問我需要哪些生活用品，家裡有的直接提來給我，更重要的是，他大力幫助我控制花費預算，指導我料理的作法，帶我去美術行等等，對我來說這些事讓我很感動。

I'd thought that today would end in such an ordinary but down-to-earth way. However, my guide today, J, took me on a very special tour around London. It kind of reminds me of the film Before Sunset, Paris. J is the most practical, the most careful, and the most caring friend among all my new acquaintances in London. Most people would just have a meal or talk with me, but J asked if she needed to pick me up in the airport before my arrival. After I came, she kept asking what house goods I lacked. If she had extra ones at home, she brought them to me. Most of all, she did her best to help me control my budget, gave me tips on cooking, and took me to an art supply shop. For me, these little acts moved me more than anything else. 

初到這個城市因為需要新朋友，我闖進了好些人的生活，我對於一見面就和我分享生活細節的人非常感謝，我明白我們也可以說些無關緊要的話。J和我見面不到幾分鐘後對我說：我下個月要結婚了。之前聽說她交了男友，沒想到一認識我便很厚顏地要求可否去參加她的婚禮，在異鄉，特別是沒有家人的陪伴，我多少想給點溫暖，我也許是新朋友，卻是帶著和其他人同樣的祝福。

Since I am a new inhabitant in the city, my need for friends make me enter some people's lives. I am especially thankful to those who share their life with me right away because I understand we can chat about insignificant things that don't matter to both of us. Upon seeing me for the first time, J revealed to me the big news that she is going to get married next month. I heard about her having a boyfriend, but I didn't expect the whole love affair to advance so fast. I asked cheekily if I can go to her wedding. Since she is also an outsider in a foreign city, without family love, I'd love to give some warmth. I might be a new friend, but I have as many best wishes as any other friend of hers. 

一整天裡，我們走過人來人往的商圈，一邊買雜貨，一邊談她的戀情，J沒有什麼保留地，像自我分析似地對我說這段關係的來龍去脈、自己和對方的改變、家裡的立場，我們從黑人區換到唐人街，一路說著，男友不斷來電話要確認婚禮的細節，我不知道自己為什麼能有特權見識J的人生，特別聽到的不只是快樂的部份，還有辛苦的部份。

For a whole day, we walked in bustling shopping areas, buying groceries and talking about her love affair. J was rather unreserved. As if conducting self-analysis, she narrated to me the development of this relationship, their change, and their family's standpoints. We moved from Camberwell to Chinatown and still carried on with the same topic. Meanwhile, her boyfriend kept calling to confirm the details of the wedding. I really have no idea why I have the privilege to witness the story, especially when there are more than happy parts. 

我說儘管許多考量，支身在國外生活是很艱苦的，雖然有朋友，但是在我的經驗裡，我在某一點如果需要安慰，友人不一定在身邊，也不一定熟稔到能夠借人家的肩膀靠，J同意男友的確是精神上的支柱，J在這個時間點和我說這話，我特別能夠體會。

I said despite many concerns of hers, it is extremely hard to live alone abroad. Some might say that there are always friends, but in my experience, when I need solace at one point, friends won't necessarily be there for me, and too often I do not know them so well to be able to lend their shoulders. J does agree that her boyfriend has helped her weather through a lot. At this time, I can especially relate to her. 

來到英國四年，從單身女孩變成待嫁人婦，雖然我沒有實際參與J的過去，我還是可以感受她的變化，看她很清楚了解將來的人生就要走上不同的道路，我衷心地祝她幸福。

After having come to the UK for four years, changing from a single girl to a woman about to be married, I can feel her change though I was not there before. Seeing that she knows well the pros and cons of her decision, I sincerely wish her happiness. 

日落時分經過王爾德伯伯的雕像，拿出一整天被我冰封的相機。他說：我們都窮困潦倒，但有些人仰望著星空。

At sunset, when we passed by the sculpture of Oscar Wilde, I took out the camera I had ignored for a whole day. He said, "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." 

當時J很可愛地問了我：你呢？你不想結婚嗎？我說：沒有不想，但反正都這個年紀了，要就要結好一點。回到宿舍，我對她說：我今天一整天雜貨都買齊了，是個富有的人。後來想想，今天感覺如此富有也是因為J送給我她的故事。

Then J turned to ask me, "What about you? You don't want to get married?" I replied, "I am not against it, but since I've waited for so long, I'd like to go for someone really nice." After we came back to Brooke Hall, I told her, "I have got all the groceries. Now I am a very rich person." But when I think about it now, I feel rich because J gave me her big story. 

在有幾顆星星的天空下，我送J出去找男友，見了面很想說：日落之後，你們都要抬頭看著星星，認真地向上地一起走下去。我則一個人雀躍地走回房間，外頭坐著的年輕樓友第一次對我微笑，我計劃著今晚睡前要打掃我的大房間。

Under the sky scattered with several stars, I walked out with J to meet her boyfriend. When I saw him, I really wanted to say, "After sunset, both of you have to look at the stars. Walk down your road together with love and enthusiasm." Then I returned to my room with glee. The young floor mates who sat outside smiled at me for the first time. I planned to clean and mop the floor before going to bed tonight. 

我想，我一個人在倫敦，也會好好的，因為我是仰望星星的人。

I think I'll be fine in London though I am all by myself because I am looking at the stars...