HOME / 心之所歸

來到這裡之後，好多新朋友問我，還有一週多才開學，要做什麼好呢？學校以外像社區裡認識的人如多明尼克問我這個問題就算了，連宿舍裡的友人也問我，我心裡喃喃，我很忙呢！奇怪，大家來到這裡不是因為對藝術有無限熱情嗎？在倫敦的藝術場合和活動多得數不清，再不然在房間裡畫畫也不錯，不過我發現問這問題的人都還蠻年輕的。

I've been asked by many new friends what to do since school won't start until the 26th of September. I didn't find it weird when someone like Dominic asked the question, but last weekend in the party, even my floor mates were at a loss about having so much free time at their disposal. I murmured to myself, "I am extremely busy!" Don't we come here because of passion for art? There are millions of art-related activities going on in London. If one is not in the mood for going out, it's pretty soothing to draw in the dorm. But I do find something in common among people who asked this question--they are rather young.

卡特琳娜說秋天是倫敦相當美好的季節，有時候天空的晴朗度都得用特級形容，這種日子裡我就是走在社區裡也看到不一樣的風景。

Caterina told me that autumn is a very wonderful season in London. True, sometimes I have to describe the sky as XX sunny. On days like this, even when I take the same route I've trodden on dozens of times, I still get to see something new. 

其實坎貝爾是黑人人口不小的地方，據說上個月的暴動就發生在我住家附近，但是我喜歡這裡靜謐的感覺，是生活的地方，而不是旅客穿梭的觀光景點。

In fact, Camberwell has a pretty large population of British Africans. I was told that some riots had happened right in this neighborhood last month. However, I like the quiet here because it's a place for living everyday lives rather than tourist spots that are always crowded with visitors. 

轉入弗洛登路之前，我常偷瞄主街上對面三樓公寓人家生活的景況，六七點的傍晚，窗戶內的橘光映著女主人剪紙般的側影，應該是在準備晚餐吧，心裡多少湧起溫馨之感。

On my way home, before taking the turn to Flodden Road from Camberwell New Road, I often peek at the apartments, especially the third floor or above to see how people go about their home lives. At around 6 or 7, the orange light that exudes from the windows highlight the black paper-cut silhouette of the hostess. I guess she is preparing dinner. The scene never fails to warm my heart. 

也在公園裡看過被警察趕走的醉漢。

I've seen a drunkard chased away by the policemen. 

可是每天來來回回坎貝爾，我有真實的感覺，我在這裡生活，目前不只是過客。

On my way to and from Camberwell, I feel strongly that I live here. I am more than a visitor for the time being. 

悠閒的週日下午出門去買雜貨，聽到坎貝爾公園傳來熱鬧的音樂，走進一看，有些繽紛五彩的攤位，但重頭戲是厄瓜多的婦女準備的舞蹈，宣傳的小姐和我說這是厄瓜多嘉年華，涼爽的倫敦秋天裡有中美洲熱力奔放的氛圍。

On my outing to buying groceries on a leisurely Sunday afternoon, I heard lively music from Camberwell Green. Taking a closer look, I found there were some colorful stalls selling snacks and handicrafts. But the most exciting part was dances prepared by Ecuadorian women. The lady giving out pamphlets told me this is an Ecuadorian carnival. Suddenly the breezy autumn in London caught on the passion and fire of Central America. 

阿姨們在音樂未開始之前就要準備好，身為在倫敦的外國人，我可以體會，隨時都要獻上最好的姿態，這是維持自信的秘訣。

The dancers had to be ready before the music started. As a foreigner in London, I totally understand the meaning of that gesture. Only by always doing my best can I remain confident. 

舞步不是特別難，舞者臉上總是掛著笑容，最後轉圈圈時，我不禁想到馬提斯的「生之喜」。

The dances weren't especially hard. The dancers always wore dazzling smiles. When they held hands turning around together, the image evoked Matisse's La Joie de Vivre. 

我不是厄瓜多人，但站在他們之中居然覺得自己也是這個社群的一份子，外國人找到連結的速度要比當地人快，這是生存的法則。

I am not Ecuadorian, but when I stood among them, I felt I was part of this community. Foreigners have a quick instinct for looking for connections, which is a major rule for us to survive. 

最近幾個同事寫信給我，提到寂寞。來到這裡第十一天，我沒有特別因為寂寞難耐的時刻，在某些短暫的時刻需要肩膀時，我連告訴路人心事也都沒有障礙，說完了，情緒過了，我昂首闊步向前進，讓我不得不猜自己前世是不是蟑螂來的。

Over the past two days, my ex-colleagues wrote to me about loneliness. I've been here for 11 days, but there  aren't really moments when loneliness almost kills me. At certain very transient moments when I needed a shoulder, I had no difficulty narrating my problems to even passers-by. After I let the bad feeling go, got over it, I strode forth without looking back. I even wonder if I was a cockroach in the previous life. 

我一直都是深受保護、很幸福的人，現在再次獨立，體驗到不同的人生，尤其是我有了自己的空間，打掃都是出於想愛護生活環境的動機，而不只是為了想幫父母分擔家務，從前的我哪知刷馬桶的快樂呢？到了倫敦有了新的生活方式，每天要下廚，在台北生活步調太緊張，一直瘦不下來，這幾天可能因為清淡飲食，自然而然就減重，可是完全不是刻意不吃。

I've been well protected all my life, and I know how lucky I am. Now I am on my own again experiencing a different life. After I moved in my large room in London, I clean it willingly on a bi-day basis totally out of the motive that I want to treat my living space well. It is more than a house chore for me. I wouldn't imagine my brushing the toilet in the past. Also, with my new lifestyle, I have to cook every day. Back in Taipei in the past summer, I was too stressed to lose weight. However, I've become a little slimmer thanks to a light diet, but I do eat well. 

不管我將來的人生如何，這一年會幫我做足準備，讓我更清楚自己的路。親愛的，請不要擔心我，現在，倫敦是我的家。

No matter what is going to happen in the future, this year will prepare me for it and make me see clearly my road. My dear, don't worry about me. Now, London is where my home is...