Miss Moon / 思思與月亮

一個半月沒有寫網誌了，因為我想要全心全意準備信誼的繪本比賽。

Because I'd like to be devoted to the preparation of the annual picture book contest of Hsin-yi Foundation, I haven't updated my blog for one and half months.

        今年的心情和往年很不一樣，腳步沒有那麼趕，我學會享受這整個過程，雖然很多時候對自己不滿意，或者到最後要印刷的階段，我無法操控所有的變因，不過很幸運地在最後幾天把稿件交出去了。

   I noticed my change this year. I learned to pace myself and enjoyed the process. Though there were moments when I was upset with myself or when I couldn't control the printing quality, yet, I was lucky enough to submit my story before the deadline . 

        想要偷懶的時候，楷維會繞過來監督，並且不斷地問：你為什麼沒有在畫圖？讓我心生罪惡。孩子們也會問：你為什麼都沒有得獎？雖然我也不知道，他們還是很體貼地說：可是我很喜歡耶！

   When I felt like lazing around, Kai would act as my supervisor asking constantly, "Why aren't you drawing? How did the story go?" He made me feel so guilty that I had to crawl back to the study. Kai and Von also asked, "How many times have you participated in the contest? How come you never won?" I didn't have any clue either, but they'd comfort me with their sweet talk: We love your books a lot!

        為了想要找到較優的印刷行，跑了很多家店，其中一家老闆對我說：這個印出來就是會有不可預測的白點，我想評審要看的不是精美的印刷。我想了很久才找到答案，今年這個比賽對我來說已經不是我和其他人的競爭，而是我對自己的要求，因為比賽是短暫的，而這本書的內容記錄的是思維的人生，還有我對自己的期許。

   To look for a better printing shop, I made much research in person. One of the owners said to me: I can't assure if white dots won't be there, but I bet it's not the printing quality that the judges will focus on. I pondered over his words for a long while, and that finally led me to a clear-sounding answer: To me, the contest is no longer about the competition this year. It's about me and myself. After all, the contest is temporary, but this book records Von's childhood and my self-expectations. 

        這週去看了伊朗電影「我們都是這樣長大的」，看到每個畫面都像看到我的人生，雖然中間有些憂愁苦惱，但我最後的結論都會回到：這一輩子可以一直畫圖，我真是個超級幸運的人！

   I went to the Iranian film The Rooster Trademark Paper this week. Every scene so reminded me of my own life. Although I couldn't help feeling anxious and frustrated while preparing the bookn, I always came to the same conclusion: Being able to draw on and on for my whole life, I am such a blessed person!

Mount Wutai / 五台山

攝於五台山‧菩薩頂 / photo taken at Pusa Ding, Wutai Mount

去了一趟山西，回家之後花了幾天養病，不知道是不是太久沒有長途旅行，到目前都還覺得飄飄然。

During the past two weeks, I took a trip to Shanxi, China. After coming home, I've been trying to recuperate. I wonder if it's because I haven't had traveled for long. I still feel dizzy, unable to find my way back into the daily routines. 

        這是一趟很累但是很豐富的旅行。我最愛的是在五台山的一天，因為看的全都是寺廟，所以小朋友紛紛喊悶，而我越走越平靜，同時卻很感動，我想即使再過個幾年，當我回想這一次的旅行，我會記得這些畫面。

   It was a very exhausting yet enriching trip. Among the places we visited, my favorite tourist spot is Wutai Mount, one of the four Buddhist meccas in China. Though my students were bored by the temples in the end, the longer I stayed, the calmer I felt. I guess I won't forget that day in the mountains even as my memory of the trip fades in a few years. 

攝於顯通寺‧五台山 / photos taken at Xiantong Temple, Wutai Mount 

攝於塔院寺‧五台山 / photo taken at Tayuan Temple, Mount Wutai 

        在塔院寺遇見一臉和善的僧人，他來自拉薩，前來五台山朝聖，我們一群人搶著和他合照，請他簽名，我不禁想到海倫老師的話：明星沒有什麼好追的，因為他們的美好面貌是父母給的，我會選擇追高僧，他們因為個人的修行而了不起。當下我們真的為高僧而瘋狂！

   We came across a very peaceful-looking monk in Ta-yuan Temple, who hails from Lhasa in Tibet to worship the gods. We literally fought to take photos with him and asked for his autographs. I couldn't help recalling a quote from my Thai teacher, Helen: There is nothing admirable about stars since they inherit their beautiful appearance from their parents. I'd choose to be a groupie of a highly spiritual monk because it takes a lot of personal effort to achieve the goal. I have to admit at that moment we were really crazy for him! 

Stories in TAI / 植標館裡的故事

兩週前種的某些黃椰子種子持續茁壯，而同時培育的象牙木卻失去生命跡象，植標館裡生命安靜地來也安靜地去。

Some of the Yellow Palm seeds planted two weeks ago keep growing, while the Ivorywood seed cultivated at the same time died. Life comes and goes in a quiet manner in TAI Herbarium. 

        現在我似乎在門口對面植了根，上週帶了速寫本放在館內的某個角落之後，過了一星期，我又帶了水彩用具，同事說：你的傢伙好像越來越多了。坐在入口處有一些人把我當作接待，如果他們又對我的畫有興趣，我們就會小聊一下。

   I seem to be rooted to the seat facing the entrance. Last week I decided to keep a sketchbook somewhere in the herbarium. This week I bring with me a set of watercolors and brushes, secretly believing I can keep them in the same locker as well. One of the senior colleagues notice my attempt. She teases me, "You have more and more stuff with you!" Some people take me as the receptionist, and if they happen to be curious about my drawings, we will have a small chat. 

       我和大家並不是很熟，但是有一位很可愛的長輩，她好幾週之前和我相識時便對我說：你可以在這裡服務很久，我都不知道自己還有多少時間。這週她要離開之前我們聊得很開心，於是我決定把同一天學到的知識和她分享，還帶她走到庭園觀察印度紫檀，我可以感受到她學習的喜悅和純樸真誠的特質。

   I don't really know everyone well, but there are some people who warm up to me pretty soon, one of whom is a very nice elderly lady Jane. When she first met me a few weeks ago, she said, "I envy you for still having a lot of time to learn here. I don't know how much time I still have." This week before she leaves, we have such a good time chatting that I decide to share with her what I learned earlier the same day. We even walk out to the garden to take a look at the Rose Wood in the outdoor garden. I can deeply feel her joy of learning and the simple and sincere personalities. 

       就算我不抬頭，我可以用非常有限的視野判斷是誰在我眼前移動，還可以藉由說話者的聲音拼湊故事。某位老師跑出館外，進來的時候帶著訪客，接下來用很欣喜的口氣對資深的同事說：這是我的姐姐。雖然看過老師的臉，但很難想像一個這樣年紀的男子如此介紹家人，感覺非常陽光。

   Even if I don't raise my head, I can judge who's in my sight based on my limited vision. Also, my hearing becomes keener. At one point, a professor runs out of the herbarium, and then he comes in with a visitor. Next he introduces her to a senior volunteer in a tone full of joy: This is my elder sister. Though I have seen the professor's face, it is hard to imagine him introducing a family member in such a sunny way. 

        我要離開之前，聽到了另一半的故事，原來老師的姐姐之前生了一場大病，能夠痊癒自然是令人高興的事，而她也想要來植標館當志工。

   Before leaving, I get to hear the second half of the story. The elder sister suffered from a serious illness, but fortunately she made a miraculous recovery. Now she is interested in being a voluntary worker in the herbarium too. 

        回家的路上，我想了想這些故事，覺得自己的生活實在是瑣碎的幸福。

   On my way home, I can't help thinking back on these stories, whether silent or loud. I realize that my life, though trivial, is a very huge blessing. 

You are so hardworking! / 你好認真！

夏天答應為小方畫一個故事，因為不能失信於小孩，所以現在很努力地在實現我的諾言。四歲的楷維不用上學，哥哥在寫作業時，他常常來和我作伴，有一晚他看到我在畫繪本時，充滿真心的感嘆說：你好認真！我轉過頭回答：我是啊！想不到他也看得出來。

I promised to draw a story for Von this past summer, so I am spending every free minute I have on it. The four-year-old Kai still hasn't gone to school, so while Von is buried in homework, he often seeks for my company. One evening when I am working on the story, he makes a heartfelt remark: You are so hardworking! I feel like that there is finally someone who really understands how I feel. I turn to him and reply, "YES, I AM!"

        發想故事的時候隨心所欲，可是真的要畫一系列的圖時，需要的是意志力、理性和講究完美的要求，昨天讀到陳致元先生一年只生產一本繪本，就知道這個過程其實是考驗個性。

   It takes imagination to brainstorm in the beginning of writing a picture book, but when I get down to drawing a series of images, it requires willpower, rationality, and perfectionism. I read about the famous Taiwanese picture book artist Chen Chih-yuan yesterday. Accomplished as he is now, he produces a picture book a year on average. This is a process that is constantly testing me for if I do not feel balanced, I can't draw well. 

        我想，我可以的。

   Despite all odds, I think I can. 

Why do we need illustration? / 插畫的必要性

腎蕨 / Tuberous Sword Fern

畫眼睛看得到的植物不難，即使剛開始不上手，左看右看左畫右畫，多練習幾次就熟練了。不過貴美出了個大難題給我，她從戶外庭園拿一株腎蕨，解釋完構造之後，領我到蕨類的成長過程插圖前，對我說：今天我希望你可以把腎蕨的演進畫出來，但是這些都是要在顯微鏡下才看得到的。於是我們很認真地把腎蕨放在顯微鏡下研究，但最多只能看到孢子群。

Drawing a plant isn't hard, even for someone like me who's not known for being precise when it comes to drawing. I might not get the hang of it right away, but practice makes perfect. However, Guei-mei gives me a tremendous challenge this time. She comes in with the Tuberous Sword Fern from the garden. After explaining to me every part, she leads me to a huge poster on which the whole development process is illustrated. Then she announces to me: I hope you can draw the same thing for the Tuberous Sword Fern. Because many images can be seen only with the help of the microscope, we struggle hard with the apparatus. Yet we can only see as much as spores.

       此時另一位同事不禁加入我們的對話：為什麼要用畫的呢？現在拍照不是很容易的事嗎？我忍不住點頭搗蒜，因為我每天都上網查植物的圖片。貴美回答：畫的不是很好嗎？以前的人也都是用畫的啊！「因為之前沒有相機啊！」我這麼喜歡插畫，卻說不出像樣的答案來，不過功課既然都出了，我還是很乖巧地坐在小鐵櫃前畫圖。

   Meanwhile another colleague can't help joining our conversation. She asks: Why do you need drawings? Isn't it easier to take photos? I can't agree more since I look for images of plants online on a daily basis. Guei-mei responds: I love drawings. People used to do that too. "That's because cameras were not available!" Much as I love illustration, I can't come up with a decent reason either. Still, the task has been given, and I'll take it. 

       然後當我畫到快要蒸發時，新展覽室的設計師走出來，他問我是不是標本館請來畫圖的，然後突然靈機一動，覺得我可以畫宣傳的海報，走之前說了一句：很有手感。於是我找到了那個下午的答案，攝影和插畫各有價值，照片可以被用在科學上的研究，可是插畫可以用在設計上，而且我相信對有些人來說，插畫可能會吸引他們走進植物的世界，這何嘗不是個好的開始？

   When I draw to such a point that I feel like evaporating, the designer for the new exhibition room walks out, asking me if the herbarium hired me to draw. Then he hits upon a brilliant idea of letting me draw the poster for the promotion. Before he leaves, he gives me the answer I was looking for: It feels idiosyncratic. It is then I realize why we need illustration. Photography can be used in scientific research, but illustration can be applied to design. Besides, for some people, illustration serves as a means to lead them into the world of plants, which I believe, is a rather wonderful beginning point. 

        在植物標本館的每一天都有驚喜。

   In TAI Herbarium, there are surprises in store for me every day. 

Autumn / 秋天裡做什麼？

楷維一早上已經幫我畫了三張明信片，卻還嚷嚷著要畫畫，懶惰的阿姨最近的新策略是：我出題目給你，你今天可以畫下雨天在家裡畫圖。因為我把點數翻三倍，就是有點為難，阿楷也答應了。

   Kai has drawn three postcards for me in the morning; still, he hasn't had enough of it. So I come up with a new strategy by giving him a topic--draw your drawing at home on a rainy day. Since I triple the  number of brownie points, he is tempted to take the challenge. 

        我覺得楷維可以畫得更好，就誘拐他加工。

   I think Kai can do a better job, so I coax him into embellishing the image. 

        剪剪貼貼變成詩意的下雨天。

   After the collage, we turn the picture into a poetic rainy day. 

       哥哥的題目是：秋天在樹林裡散步。思維很高興地接下挑戰。

   The topic for Von is: Taking a walk in the woods in autumn. He seems highly motivated. 

        趁他走開時我拿出壓克力顏料，又幫他亂剪亂貼的，想不到狂野的楷維整個不行，搶著要幫忙。

   As he goes away, I add an acrylic touch and some more collage. Meanwhile, Kai is all worked up, fighting to help his elder brother. 

        沒有颱風的秋天是真的如此充滿光亮喔！

   This is how an autumn day without any typhoon looks, full of light and breeze. 

       也可以來個溫暖的散步！

   Or it's a good idea to go for a warm walk! 

I love TAI & THAI

象牙木種子/ the seed of Ivorywood

植物標本館的同事們對我很好，不只是客客氣氣地好，而是幫助我自我發揮。有一天做標本做到一半時，貴美說，不如請我畫黃椰子種子的生長狀況，她搬了一張小板凳，我就靠在面對門口的矮鐵櫃上畫圖。

My colleagues in TAI Herbarium are extremely nice to me. I do not mean the superficial politeness. Rather, they let me be. One day while I am working on making a specimen, Guei-mei suggests that I draw the growth of certain seeds. She thus grabs a stool for me to sit facing the door of the herbarium. It reminds me of my childhood whiling time away in my mom's office. 

        當時我只有一盒無印良品的筆，貴美又抓了幾隻畫重點的蠟筆和A4白紙，我覺得自己好像回到兩年前在坎貝爾的第一堂課，觀察畫法是一切的起點，我必須用有限的用具捕捉種子的觸感，當下忘了自己在標本館裡，而是在倫敦的教室裡和宿舍裡。

   I have only a box of colored ballpoint pens of MUJI. Guei-mei offers some crayon-like markers and blank A4 paper. Suddenly I feel like being in the first class in Camberwell when we learn the observed drawing. I have to capture the essence of the object with a limited choice of art supplies. For the moment I truly forget that I am in the herbarium. Instead, I think I am in the studio in Camberwell and in my dorm. 

 黃椰子種子/ the seed of Yellow Palm

        倫敦的生活對我來說真的是很遙遠了，有時候也會有一點點羨慕同學可以過著全心畫圖的生活，但是那一個下午我像搭時光機回到當時，讓我看到我的現在也很有價值。連只認識我幾分鐘的新同事居然都情不自禁地說：你很幸福！

   To me, the year in London is more than eons away. Sometimes I do feel a very tiny dose of envy for my ex-classmates, who can spend all their time drawing. However, I take the time machine that afternoon and relive the wonderful moments. Meanwhile, this tells me that my current life is equally meaningful. I beam with so much joy that even a new colleague makes the remark: You are such a blessed person! 

        另外一件令我同樣開心的事是泰文課，因為每天都要看泰劇，這週年輕帥氣的老師不禁問我是不是有泰國友人，我想說我的朋友都是明星來著，不過還是忍住了。我的當下不是英國，但我有TAI 和THAI。

   Something else that pleases me is my Thai lesson. Since I watch Thai lakorns every day, this week my young and cute Thai teacher can't help asking if I have Thai friends for me to practice the language with. I swallow the urge to say, "Yeah, my friends are all big stars." My present is not the UK, but I have my beloved TAI Herbarium and the Thai language. 

Guts / 膽量

Company / 陪伴

陪你，也陪自己。

I keep you and myself company.

Before and after / 前世來生

這學期我們讀「最後十四堂星期二的課」，因為知道今世的這一刻孩子們挺苦悶的，我請大家想自己的前世來生，拿小蕙贊助的藝術紙，看他們可以變出什麼有趣的圖面。

This semester we read Tuesdays with Morrie together. Knowing that the girls are having quite a hard time dealing with loads of homework, this week I asked everyone to think about their previous and afterlife. I would like to be inspired by their creativity with the art paper sponsored by Huei.

       本來想邊放英式流行樂，但由於網路不通，我轉放很有個性的匈牙利民謠，不知道是我的錯覺還如何，每次讓大家做手工時，我總是感受教室的氣氛變祥和了。

   I had planned to play British pop, but the Internet connection was off. So we listened to the idiosyncratic Hungarian folk music. It might be my illusion that whenever I make kids do handicrafts, it feels so peaceful and pleasant in the classroom. 

       很多話題用語言直述，多少顯得赤裸裸，用一張圖表達時卻增加了那麼多詩意。

   When we use language to tackle a problem, it feels naked. Yet, with an image, it becomes much more poetic. 

       我的前世是一顆樹，來生是快樂的藝術家，不過這些心願在這一生都找到出口了。

   I was a tree in my previous life, and in my afterlife, I will be a happy artist. Luckily, I think I can be both in my current life. 

       而我這輩子最後會轉型成用美術教英文的老師，不會有考試也不會有功課。

   And in this life I will evolve into an English teacher teaching with the help of art. What's better, there will be neither tests nor homework! 

What were your colors? /原來是什麼顏色？

現在看到新標本的第一個問題是：它原來是什麼顏色？因為烘乾之後的色調和有生命的色調完全不同，所以我對於植物原來的顏色很好奇。華南薯蕷的果實標本有種紅銅色的亮澤感，也是很迷人的，不過生長時淺綠的豆莢也很可愛。

The first question that comes to mind when I see a new herbarium specimen is: What were its colors? The main color themes after plants are dried are very different from those when they were alive. The dried pea pods have a red copper hue, which I admit look very beautiful. But the light green color of the fresh pod is quite lovely too. 

        要回家的路上撿到掉落的第倫桃，又折回標本館詢問，結果前輩們異口同聲地說出第倫桃，如果我的學生學習時也這麼自動自發就好了。接著貴美告訴我有關果實的資訊，據說可以整個煮，但裡面的果肉很少。在這裡只要我展現高度的學習慾望，大家就不斷地和我分享。

   On my way home, I picked an Elephant Apple that had fallen on the ground. Wanting to find out what it is, I returned to the herbarium. It was an amazing sight to hear everyone tell me the name in unison. What if my students were such highly-motivated learners ... Then Guei-mei went on to share more information about the fruit with me. The fruit can be cooked to make jam, but there isn't much flesh inside. I love being in this place because as long as I show interest and desire to learn, my colleagues are too willing to show me the fantastic world of plants. 

        最後貴美為了帶我看十字菩瓜樹，陪我走了一小段路，像是我的植物家教，耳聞這種植物有一陣子，親眼看到特別的葉片造型還是大呼驚奇，造物者的想像力真是無窮無盡。

   In order to show me the three-leaf calabash, Guei mei took a short walk with me. I felt very lucky to have a botany tutor. Though I had heard about the plant for a while, I was surprised to see it in person. The leaf is shaped like a cross, and what's more, it's hard to find in Taiwan. 

        接下來我要好好學習畫植物，讓沒有看過的人也可以第一眼就精準地抓住它們的特色。

   My next task is to learn how to draw plants so that people who have never seen them before can immediately grasp their features. 

Chris Botti

弟弟送我去聽Chris Botti的音樂會，我坐在第三排正中央的位置，Botti帥氣的全身完全收入眼底，還有美麗的小提琴家Caroline Campbell和才華洋溢的黑人女歌手Sy Smith當特別來賓，聽完之後簡直就像在艾佛勒斯峰上看世界，視野都不同了。

Jun treated me to the concert of Chris Botti. Seated in the third row, I was only a few steps away from the handsome musician. Also, we were blessed to have the super beautiful violinist Caroline Campbell and super talented singer Sy Smith. I felt like being in seventh heaven after the concert. 

        以前曾經追過一位法國漫畫家的網誌，很羨慕他在音樂會時可以當場素描，雖然當下我必須全心全意欣賞視覺和聽覺的饗宴，不過回家之後練習畫Chris很多天才上手，因為他實在太帥了，站姿一定也是排演過的吧！

   I used to follow the blog of a French bande dessinee illustrator. I envied him for doing live sketches during concerts. I just had to focus on the fabulous performance, and it took me days afterwards to practice drawing Botti because I did not want to ruin his good looks. I wonder if he rehearsed the standing pose too....