rainy days / 雨天

今夏的關西行裡，每天都是艷陽日，到了旅行的後半部，我開始躲避陽光，終於在我要回家的前一天，大阪城烏雲密布，不多久雨便轟隆隆地落下，行人紛紛尋找避雨之處。

On my trip to Kansai this summer, Mr. Sun made his appearance almost every day. On the second half of my journey, I started to feel sick and tired, only wanting to shy away from it. Finally, the day right before I was about to go home, dark clouds covered the whole sky of Osaka. Within hours, the rain poured, which forced pedestrians on the streets to look for shelter.

當時我在歷史博物館裡蹓躂，對於下雨這件事，完全沒有抱怨的心情，我買了些紀念品，打了通電話回家和母親閒聊，她開心地和我述說最近小方又說了甚麼可愛的話，雨還是不停地下，我便學一樓大廳的歐巴桑歐吉桑，坐在冷冰冰的地板上寫日誌。走出博物館時，外面溼答答的，我對自己說，這是最後一天旅行了，能多看些地方就去吧，我踩著淋濕的拖鞋，轉車到黑門市場，吃了一碗熱騰騰的拉麵，然後當我到達心齋橋，要和這個給我血拼快感的聖地道別時，突然瞥見雨中很詩情畫意的法善寺橫丁，和雨後如釋重負的大阪天空，沒有預期的畫面為我的旅行畫下很寫意的句點，我很幸福。

At that moment, I was killing time in the lovely history museum of Osaka. I did not feel annoyed about the rain in the least. I bought some souvenirs, made a call home, had a chat with my mom about the new cute remarks Von made. The rain continued. I imitated the middle-aged people around me and sat on the hard, cold floor to write my journal. When I left the museum, it was soaking wet outside. Since it was the last day of my trip, I might as well see some more places. Walking in my wet sandals, I transferred to Kuromon Market and found a superb ramen place. Then, in arriving at Shinsaibashi, the gorgeous shopping heaven, I accidentally caught a glimpse of the poetic Houzenji Lane in the rain and also the light grayish blue sky in the evening after the rain. These unexpected pictures marked a beautiful period to my trip. I was very lucky.

最近那樣悠哉面對雨天的心情已經不見了，還好昨天聽到了一句話，我把改成自己的版本，就是說，雨天也有力量，我要認真面對。

Lately my easygoing mood has been gone. Fortunately, I heard some very powerful words yesterday and adapted them into my version, that is, rainy days serve their purpose. I should look at them face to face.

afternoon tea mood / 下午茶心情

對我來說，旅行裡的腳步得不停地調適，剛開始我總是像苦命的旅行僧，靠著我鐵人般的雙腳走遍大江南北，雖然很痛快，但是少了休假該有的悠閒自在。當我的體力無法再負荷如此嚴格的行程之際，我的心也開始放鬆，目標從一日三四個景點變成一兩處，其他的時間就吃吃喝喝，能如此自我放縱，真的是種福氣。

It takes me time to find the right pace on a trip. In the beginning, I always travel like a highly self-demanding monk. I drag my steely legs and walk far and wide to get to my destinations. I do enjoy myself; somehow, the relaxing feel that belongs to travelers is missing. Later, when my body can't take the rigorous physical challenges anymore, I start to loosen up. My daily goal, which originally includes three to four destinations, will be cut down to one or two. As for the rest of the time, I end up chilling out in air-conditioned cafes, savoring my afternoon tea. It is really a luxury to indulge myself like that.

下午茶心情看似平凡，但想不到旅行一結束，這般輕鬆的心情便蒸發至空氣中了，本來以為還在身邊，回頭怎麼找也找不到。最近我的焦慮指數快要破表，這件事說出來，很多以為我總是老僧入定的人大概要幻滅了。

You might think that there is nothing about what I call "the afternoon tea mood." Well, right after my trip ended, that beautiful state of mind evaporated into the air. Even when I turned around, it was no longer with me. Lately, I've been so anxious that I hardly know it to be me. I guess a lot of people who'd have the image of my being zen will be disillusioned.

因為看不慣自己歇斯底里的，我想自我剖析一下。這一切和今年夏天有很大的關係，假如我們之間在6月4日以後就畫上了句點，彼此都客客氣氣相待，而不是如此坦誠地走進彼此的生命裡，毫無保留地分享，我在感情上就不會如此依賴。可是好多事情發生了，但它們反而讓我有些害怕將來的未知，因為這個夏天太美好，你們在我的心中太美好，完全不可取代。

I am not used to my hysterical self, so a short self-analysis might help. All this has much to do with this summer. If nothing had gone on between us after June, 4th and we had always been polite toward one another instead of opening up our hearts, I wouldn't be so dependent emotionally. Yet, so many things have happened, and I have lost the ability to just walk away into the unknown of the future. After all, this summer is too beautiful, you are too beautiful, totally irreplaceable.

去年此時我和你說的，每天要帶著下午茶心情去上班，本來只是開玩笑的，想不到這句話成了我今年必須要很努力才能達到的目標。沒關係，我的心很大，還裝得下一些人，就算剛開始甚麼也沒有，我有許多誠意。總有一天，我們可以平靜自在地相待‧‧‧

I told you last year at this time that I would go to work every day with my afternoon tea mood. I was sort of kidding then, but these words become a very clear goal for me now. I have to work hard to reach it. Well, I guess my heart is big enough to accommodate some more people. Even if there is nothing between us for the time being, I have my sincerity to offer. One day, we will end up being at ease in the presence of each other...

hanamikoji / 花見小路

以前從沒想過會去同樣的地方旅行兩次，尤其是海外，但是今年夏天我回到了睽違五年的花見小路，內心當然是有些感受，那個冬天我和其他三名單身女性同行，這趟旅行只剩下我，不過如果京都之行是上天給單身女性的獎賞，我倒覺得自己很幸運。

It never occurred to me that I would travel to the same place abroad twice. However, this summer I found myself in Hanamikoji (a road in Gion, Kyoto), where I had visited five years ago. I did have some mixed feelings. That winter I was in the company of three other single women, but on this trip, I was the only traveler. As an optimist, I can't help but wonder, if a trip to Kyoto alone is the gift God has for single women, I consider myself to be the chosen one.

花見小路上倒不是花朵遍野，而是一條充滿著高級料理亭的小路，我遠渡重洋，居然就只是來拍攝這些望著門外觀看的歐吉桑，這種悠閒的心情真的是只有我獨享。

There are no flowers on Hanamikoji (hana: flower). It is a small lane lined with classical restaurants. I traveled all the way just to take photos of those middle-aged men who looked at the by-passers during their break time. No one could beat my leisurely pace.

但是我看到的不只是歐吉桑，再走一趟花見小路讓我把人生又想了一遍，雖然來到同一個地方，心境已轉了好幾峰。之前的旅行精華在於和最熟悉的同伴探索新世界，之後我們選擇不同的路，沿途我看到很美好的風景，遇到許多我真心喜歡的人，我希望你的路也同樣佈滿美麗的花朵。

Well, I saw more than those men. Revisiting Hanamikoji gave me a chance to think about my life again. I felt something quite different from many years ago. That trip we took together was beautiful in that I explored a new world with the most familiar people in my life. Later, we went on diverse ways. On my journey, I saw lovely scenery and ran into many people I truly like. I sincerely hope that your road is filled with as many flowers.

誰說重遊舊地沒有驚喜呢？這就像是我們每天走同樣的路線去同樣的地方上學上班，我們都明瞭今天已不是昨天，而生活的每一刻都是一條花見小路，到處充滿了不可預期的美麗‧‧‧

Who said that there are no surprises in revisiting the same place? We take the same route to go to the same place for studies or work every day. We all know that today is not yesterday, but every moment in life is a path filled with flowers and unpredictable beauty...

another dream episode / 夢想番外篇

很久以前在報紙上讀到有關安郁茜教授的一篇文章，她和已經畢業的學生還是會三不五時地聚在一起做手工，我當時便很有感觸，在學的學生因為作業要求，可以做出令人驚豔的手作品，這種能力始終不會消失，只不過是當我們開始工作之後，它就被遺忘了，因此我內心也有個小小的夢想，希望自己也有機會能和學生一起做手工。

I read an article in the newspaper about Professor An of Shi Chien University a long time ago. She got together with students that had graduated once in a while for making handicrafts. I totally related to her because students at school, under a proper amount of pressure, never fail to surprise me with their amazing hand-made works. This ability does disappear, but it's totally forgotten after we start working and do not bother to spend time on little but beautiful things anymore. Thus, I've always had a little dream--to make handicrafts with my students one day.

我的朱銘計畫其實尚未結束，壁畫完工之後，緊接而來的是8月31日藝術市集的產品準備，從有到無的過程雖然不長，但是我和家人、友人及學生不停切磋，我也進行了好幾次的產品研發，終於找到方向，接下來就是產品的限量生產過程。

My project at Ju-ming Art Museum is not over yet. After I finished the mural, I didn't have time for a break because I had to prepare the products for the art fair on August, 31. It didn't take me long to create something out of nothing. However, I tried and modified again and again thanks to the advice and encouragement from my family, friends and students. Finally, I found my way. Then came the production of limited editions of my works.

這時候我就深深感受到，有學生真是件好事！我們共八人在某個炎熱的夏日裡，像女工馬不停蹄地工作，懶散的時候還會被我碎碎念。大家共同的心得就是，做手作品這一行不如我們原本想像地愜意和浪漫，途中不時聽到女孩們的慘叫聲，我的心總會糾結一下，可能是哪條線又割歪了，或者是有人又割到自己的手指。在無法達到目標設定的工作績效時，我們就不斷地抬高產品價位，畢竟那裡面有我們的辛勤勞工啊！

At this time I deeply believed that teaching is such a wonderful job, with so many students at my command when I need them. The eight of us toiled like factory workers on a hot August day. When anyone was slack, I would begin nagging. We all had the feeling that making handicrafts is not as carefree and romantic as we thought. Sometimes girls screamed, and my heart would slightly ache. It might be that they screwed up the expensive paper boards or that they cut their own fingers. When we fell behind our schedule, we would begin to raise the bottom price of a single piece. After all, we worked hard for these products!

最後我還是要大力感謝各位熱心的同學幫助，讓我可以順利地完成產品的準備。如果你很好奇我的葫蘆裡到底賣甚麼藥，請你8月31日到朱銘美術館來，就可以買到我和女孩們共同完成的作品！

So I have to thank the girls for coming to help so that I could finish the preparation of my products. If you are curious about what I am going to sell exactly, please come to Ju-ming Art Museum on August, 31. Then you can get my first commercially-sold works!

talented Mr. Ando / 安藤魅力

我喜歡的藝術類型偏於柔性，對於建築我並不特別感興趣，但是這次的京阪神之旅中，安藤忠雄的名字不斷地出現在我的導覽資料中，而我對這傢伙也久聞其名，便想親眼看看他的建築風格，到底有甚麼了不起的地方。

My favorite art genres can be described as the soft and light types. To be honest, I am not particularly interested in architecture. However, on my trip to Kansai, the name Ando Tadao was mentioned again and again in my tour guide information. I had long heard about this man too, so it was a superb opportunity for me to take a look at his works in person and find out why he is so admired.

攝於姬路文學館 / photographed at the literature museum, Himeji

去到姬路文學館之前，我在炎熱的姬路城裡繞到幾乎是眼冒金星，但是不知哪蹦出來的決心，我就是想看安藤的設計，於是我在幾近無人的路上行走，繞進安靜的住宅區，找到了位置隱密的文學館。文學館從外頭看，簡單俐落，沒有花俏的線條和熱鬧的幾何圖形，等我走進館內，第一件事就是坐下來休息，我從休憩區巨大的落地窗望外看，發現安藤並沒有我剛才想的那麼單純，原來外頭淺淺的水池不只是裝飾，隨著微風，水面形成美麗自然的波動，當下的我非常感動，建築物本身要和外在結合才厲害啊！文學館內的展示我看不懂，但是拜訪文學館卻是我認為當天最有收穫的行程。

Before I went to the literature museum in Himeji, I was totally exhausted after a long tour in the vast Himeji castle. I could have left and found a cafe for a break, but I was determined to visit the museum designed by Ando. I walked on, without seeing any other pedestrians on such a hot day. Finally, I found the way to the museum in a quiet neighborhood. Seen from the outside, the design is simple and neat. There are no decorative lines or complicated geometric patterns. The first thing I did after I got in was to sit down. The French window gave me a very good view of the scene outside. It was then that I realized that Ando's design wasn't as simple as I had expected. The shallow pond is more than a decoration. The surface of the water rippled with the breeze. I was so touched at that moment. Heart-moving architecture has to combine the buildings themselves and the exterior environment. I didn't understand a thing about the exhibits in the museum, but the visit was the most rewarding part in my itineraries that day.

攝於Suntory博物館‧大阪 / photographed at Suntory Museum, Osaka

我在五光十色的大阪購物散盡家財後，不，應該是說，當購物已經無法再滿足我之際，我一心想拜訪位於大阪港的Suntory博物館，導覽上說，這是結合海洋和夕陽的設計，聽起來真是誘人。到了現場之後，發現安藤果然用力地運用周遭的優勢，在入口處附近的休息區，便可以遠眺一望無際的港口，甚至是觀賞展覽之餘，也都能欣賞外頭的美景。最後我從建築外層的鏡面，看到了反射的海洋，我終於深切地感受到安藤魅力了。

After I spent all my money shopping in the dazzling Osaka commercial center, or I should say when shopping couldn't satisfy me anymore, I wanted badly to go to Suntory Museum located near Osaka harbor. The tour guide pamphlet says that this is the design that combines the sea and the sunset. How tempting! When I arrived, I did see how Ando made the best use of the advantages of the location. In the rest area near the entrance, the visitors can see the boundless blue water. Even on other floors, we are offered an excellent view of the harbor. In the end, I saw the sea reflected on the mirror windows on the outside of the museum. I finally experienced the amazing talent of Mr. Ando.

我對於建築真的是一竅不通，不過好的藝術品就是要有感動人心的力量，這才是創作最有力的出發點啊！

I know nothing about architecture, but there is a rule that can be applied to good art--the power to move people, whether artists or non-artists!

the dream has come true / 夢想實現了

08/09/08

夢想像磁鐵一樣，把大家都吸到我身邊來。

Dreams are like magnets. They draw people to my side...

因為是最後一天的工程，所以我把有興趣參與壁畫的朋友都叫來了，於是今天就像是場熱鬧的夏日派對，大家輪番上陣畫自己認領的小白人。即將前往美國的荳荳，把還沒收完的行李擱在一旁，千里迢迢從台北坐車來，我讓她畫她的情侶衝浪圖，她還先設計未來男友的樣子，雖然很歡樂，不過有些捨不得就是了。

Today was the last day of work, so I gathered those friends who might be interested in wall painting. So it was more like a crazy summer party rather than hard work. Everyone took turns to draw their favorite little white dream man. Miss Bean, who is leaving for the US in two days, came all the way from Taipei, though she hadn't really finished packing. I let her paint her surfing couple. She got to design the looks of her future boyfriend. The party was merry, but it wasn't easy to live with the idea that she is going to spend her life in another part of the world from now on...

我們緊緊擁抱說再見之後，我又繼續上工，本來計畫五點多就可以收工，但是友人對於我的背景色有意見，家柔堅持背景要上漸層，效果會比較突出。於是可憐的薛吉和佩倪把收好的油漆罐，又一一搬出來，因為游爸訂了個吃金山鴨肉當晚餐的目標，讓我重生戰鬥力，非在晚間七點半之前完成作品。

After we hugged and said goodbye, I resumed my work. I had planned to wrap up everything at about 5:30 pm, but friends had different opinions about my background colors. Jia-ro insisted that I should brush various colors onto the single-color background to highlight the dreamy effect. Poor Shaggy and Penny had to take out the paints again, after they had just put them away in the storage room. Fortunately, my dad set a goal of taking everyone to Jingshan for dinner, and it gave me the determination to have the painting done before 7:30 pm.

晚間的遊客量大增，還好公關部主任游爸及時趕到，為敝人處理和外界溝通的事項。大概是因為今晚的工作組員數量龐大，形成了有趣的工作畫面，例如說，廖小姐就為我們的傳遞顏料方式取了個「天空組」、「地面組」的機制，於是連路過的攝影師也來摻一腳，直叫我擺出各種姿勢，並且一邊喃喃自語：「實在是太棒了！」真是個熱情的歐吉桑啊！

The number of visitors in the evening exploded. Luckily, there was Mr. You, the chief of public relations in our work team. He came to rescue me and answer questions from the passers-by. It was probably because we had a large staff today. The way we worked must have looked terribly funny. For example, when I had to paint the top, friends had to stand on the ladders to pass the paints to me, so Hsin-y had an amusing way to describe our work pattern. She said we had "the sky team" and "the ground team." Even a passing-by photographer couldn't help but become part of the drama and asked me to pose for him, constantly murmuring "Fantastic!" What a passionate middle-aged man!

完成之後 ，最令人興奮的簽名時間終於來了，雖然剛開始有些人很羞赧，不好意思把自己的名字簽上去，那其實都是因為他們覺得自己的字太醜，不過半推半就，大家都很開心地把名字留在敝人的牆面上，一心想紅的游爸在我的代簽後，心花怒放，我還為荳荳留下一枚她很想得到的唇印，這大概是我畫壁畫一個多月以來的最高點了。

After the painting came the most exciting moment of leaving our names on the wall. In the beginning, some people were quite shy, but it was actually because they thought their handwriting was too ugly. In the end, everyone wrote down their name. Mr. You, who had wanted to be famous, smiled without stop after I signed his name for him. I even drew a pair of red lips for Miss Bean because she wanted it badly. This was the climax of my more-than-one-month-long wall-painting task.

實現夢想的一路上，靠了許多人的幫忙才走到這裡，感謝我的游氏夫婦忠實交通部隊，每周末不厭其煩地載送我往返台北金山；感謝非常勞碌的薛吉，除了提供我優良的民宿外，還有無微不至的照顧，而我居然到最後一天才決定為她在畫面上加入屬於她的鄺麗貞小白人；感謝來幫忙的尿包、家柔、良蕙、佩倪、新慧；感謝馨予、雅鈞，常常受到我各式各樣的騷擾；感謝我隔一戶的鄰居卓小弟，非常大方地分享經驗和幫助；最後要感謝三禮，讓我畫出這張圖，好像是要說再見了，可是再見的意思就是要再次再次地見面吧！

It was with many people's help that I got to make my dream come true. Many thanks to my dad and mom, who drove me back and forth between Taipei and Jingshan every weekend without any complaints; many thanks to hard-working Shaggy, who offered me an excellent lodging place and the best care in the world. Well, I even didn't paint a white man that belonged to her until the last day; many thanks to Hsin-y, Jia-ro, Liang-hui, Penny, and Hsin-hui for their help; many thanks to Hsin-yu and Ya-jun, who had to put up with my harassment in all forms; many thanks to Hong-chien, who was so generous to share his experience and even brush. Last but not least, many thanks to Class Li, who gave me the inspiration for the picture. This seems to be the moment of saying goodbye, but in Chinese goodbye means "seeing each other again and again."

再見了我的夢想，我要朝下一個夢想前進了！

Goodbye my dream. I am moving forward to my next dream!

better not to go further / 這樣就好

人和人的交集到底有甚麼道理呢？年輕時候的我對於新朋友是很有保留的，現在的我也還存有保留的機制，但是隨著年紀增長，我開始想要抓住些甚麼，也許只是一晚的相談甚歡，就讓我想要把那樣的短暫延長，不過，我最終還是想到很久之前的一位朋友送我的一句話，離開了共同的空間和時間，人很少會再有談話上的交集。

Is there any pattern or formula in our coming across new people? When I was young, I was highly reserved in interacting with new friends. I might still be, to a certain degree, but with time passing, I was eager to hold onto something. Maybe it was just a merry night of drinking and talking, but it gave me the longing to lengthen that moment. However, in the end, everything all came down to some remarks made by a friend a long time ago: without being in the same place and time zone, we hardly have anything to talk about.

已經很久沒有在旅行途中和那麼多陌生人有交集了，這次因為一個人，因為我渴望著擴大自己的世界，於是我拋開了自我保留的功能。在某種程度以內的互動都是愉快而美麗的，但是當我對於別人的認識越來越深入時，其實我的內心並沒有充足的準備，於是我看到的和之前的印象不一定相符，我多少有些驚嚇，便不停自問這一切究竟是如何發生，雖然我很明白，是我自己吧！

I had not met so many new people during a trip for a few years. This time I was alone and desired to meet the big world. I thus discarded the in-built function of being reserved. My interaction, within a certain range, was pleasant and beautiful. However, when I got to know some people more than I could afford mentally, I saw something conflicting with my first impression. Then I couldn't stop asking myself how all this had happened. Meanwhile, I knew well that I myself had to take the responsibility.

攝於京都青年旅館 Tour Club 外 / photo taken outside the hostel Tour Club, Kyoto

錯就錯在我太想賦予意義給這些偶然的相逢了，但是它們本身也許是沒有意義的，我看著其他人毫不留戀地前行，我懷疑自己究竟怎麼了，居然在這個不怎麼樣的節骨眼上多愁善感了起來。現在我又要重新學習，瀟灑地讓過去的過去，邁開腳步往前走。

My fault lay in that I wanted too much to give meaning to these coincidental encounters. But perhaps they were meaningless. I saw others move forward without looking back. I wondered what was wrong with me. My sentimentality took hold of me at such an insignificant moment. Now I have to learn again to let bygones be bygones and stride forward.

我不擔心也不再小心翼翼了，如果我們真的有緣，你就會再回到我的生命裡。如果不是，那我們走這裡，就好。

I am no longer worried. Nor am I afraid that I'll lose anything. If we are meant to be, you'll eventually come back to my life. If not, then it is better for us, not to go further.

sunset / 黃昏時分

今年的關西熱不啦嘰的，而我又是個很操勞的旅者，大部分的時候多在太陽底下行走，所以這次的旅行裡，每天一到黃昏，我就有種解脫的感覺，除了氣溫降低、熱氣褪去之外，天空的顏色有種令人迷醉的美麗。白天的京都陽光閃亮地令人眼花撩亂，很難想像認知中的古典美女也有比基尼女郎的滿滿活力，不過到了傍晚，這個城市便換上了微醺的紅顏，欲拒還迎，我只是靜靜地坐在路邊等車，盯著天空，也可以感受到京都的魅力。

Kansai this summer is quite intimidating with its scorching heat. I happen to be a laborious traveler. I spent most of the time walking under the sweltering sun. So on this trip, at evening time, I felt totally relieved. Apart from the cool breeze and receding heat, the sky took on intoxicating colors. Kyoto in the daytime is dazzling with its blinding sunshine. It's hard to imagine a city often compared to a classical beauty can be so sunny and energetic as a bikini girl. However, at sunset, the city's blushing sky did remind me of a shy yet super charming woman. Even though I just sat at the bus stop, doing nothing but gaze at the sky, I could feel the beauty of Kyoto.

黃昏不是一天的結束，往往在我以為當日的旅行已經走到盡頭，正要回住宿處休息之際，許多無法期待的意外就這麼發生。我想就是近黃昏的人生也會充滿轉折和驚喜吧！

The sunset is not the period of a day. Usually when I thought the trip of that day was about to end, and I planned to go back to my lodging place for a quiet evening, many unexpected episodes took place. I believe that even life at its sunset time is the same, still full of twists and turns.

攝於祇園‧京都 / photo taken at Gion, Kyoto

攝於祇園‧京都 / photo taken at Gion, Kyoto

攝於京都國立博物館附近 / photo taken near Kyoto National Museum

攝於大阪港‧大阪 / photo taken at Osaka Harbor, Osaka

就連到了我評價不高的大阪，在我咕噥沒甚麼看頭之際，這個城市也沒讓我失望，大阪港口的黃昏美得讓我無法停止按快門，我的心情因而從谷底攀升，並且對這個商業城刮目相看。

Even in Osaka, a city I didn't think highly of, when I was moaning and groaning about its lack of culture, the city didn't disappoint me. The sunset at Osaka Harbor was so breathtaking that I couldn't stop pressing the button of my camera. Previously in the dumps, I was suddenly lifted and had a very different idea of Osaka.

不過，當日本友人問我大阪到底有甚麼好玩的，我很難用文字訴說我所看到的美景和心情的改變，但是我知道，如果她沒有親自看過大阪夏日的黃昏，我再怎麼轉述也無濟於事，她只能一直抱著對這個城是負面的想法，而不知自己究竟錯過了甚麼。

Yet, when a Japanese friend asked me what was worth seeing in Osaka, it was hard for me to describe what I had seen and felt in words. If she never saw the wonderful sunset in person, no matter how I embellished it, she would just live in her fixed thinking of the city without knowing what she had missed.

總歸一句話，還是要去旅行啊！

In brief, just go traveling!

aged soul / 蒼老的靈魂

從日本旅行回來之後，奧莉薇問我京都好不好玩，我答道，這大概是世界上我最喜歡的都市之一了，她接著說，都是廟宇，我居然還那麼開心，大概是我有著蒼老的靈魂吧！我對於這句話感同身受，好像我一路走來都有著深刻的體驗。

After I returned from Japan, my friend Olivia asked me if I had had fun in Kyoto. I replied that it is probably one of my favorite cities in the world. She then went on to say, "There are mostly temples and you were not bored. You must have an aged soul..." I quite identify with this remark because I've felt that way all along.

我拜訪了十家以上的廟宇，雖然到最後有點吃不消，但是每座廟帶給人的感動都不一樣，而且不像大台北的寺廟，京都的廟和周邊的自然環境互相結合，所以一到了廟裡，心不靜下來也難。

I visited more than ten temples and shrines. In the end, it was indeed too much for me, but every temple gave me different emotional impact. Unlike the temples in Taipei City, those in Kyoto were designed and built to accommodate nature. So every time I walked into one, I hardly get out without feeling any mental peace.

和雄性的城堡比起來，寺廟是柔性的代表，來到廟裡，大家紛紛放下身段，為自己和別人祈願，我看到的是人們沒有防衛的一面。沒有人知道參拜者之後的命運是否有奇蹟式的改變，不過應該有很多人去到廟裡之前是充滿憂慮的，而離開寺廟的當兒，多少有鬆了一口氣的感覺。要說拜拜只是為了心安，這小小的舉動卻可以省掉多少看心理醫生的花費。

Compared with masculine castles, temples and shrines are soft, feminine. In there, everyone discards their self-pride, pray for themselves and others. I saw people without defense. No one knows if our fate will miraculously change after visits to temples. However, most of us go there filled with worries, but when we leave, we more or less feel relieved. Worshipping gods may be considered only as a self-reassuring act, but it has saved us the enormous costs of seeing shrinks.

所以仔細觀察的話，廟裡有著許多故事，渺小卻很感動人心。我在美麗的清水寺裡，瞥見一對年輕的情侶，男孩攙扶著眼睛被矇起來的女孩，一路朝著戀愛的占卜石前進，因為只要通過考驗，他們就是注定要在一起。我看到的不是命運的操弄，而是這兩個人想要在一起的渴望，這樣不就夠了嗎？

Thus, on close observation, there are actually mang stories going on in temples. Though they appear insignificant at first sight, they can be touching. For example, I spotted a young couple in the beautiful Kiyomizu shrine. The boy held the blindfolded girl by the arm, moving toward the stone of love. As long as they passed the test, they would be together. What I saw was not how fate controlled them, but rather, their desire to be with each other. Isn't that enough?

下山的時候，再度遇見兩人高興地離去，我想他們一整天都有著飛揚的好心情吧！可是，神祉一定在他們背後微笑，喃喃自語：「我甚麼也沒做啊！」

When I went down the hill, I ran into them again. They two looked very happy together. I bet they could keep the good mood for a whole day. But the gods were probably smiling behind their backs, murmuring, "Ha, I didn't do anything!"

finish point / 終點

這兩個月裡，我一直在移動著，從感情的快速轉換，到時空的旅行，或穿梭在先前不屬於的團體，今天終於告一段落，我想要安靜下來，專心地過這裡的人生。

In the past two months, I have been moving, from my emotional attachment, to traveling across space and time, or trying to be part of a group I did not belong to. Today, everything has finally come to an end. I want to stop moving and focus on my life here.

旅行的時候，有天在和人群有交流時，腦海裡閃過一句話，看過了那麼大的世界，當一切都沉澱之後，真的重要的人，只會顯得更重要。

On my trip, while I was trying to mingle with new friends one day, a sentence crossed my mind--after I have seen the big world, those people who are important for me will only appear to be more important.

傍晚回家時，心裡沒有想其他的，就只是想看到你的臉龐‧‧‧

On my way home this evening, nothing was on my mind but the crazy desire to have a glimpse at your face...

on the way 4 / 夢想實現中 4

08/02, 08/03

後生可畏

The new tides keep rising...

八月的溫度似乎有節節攀升的趨勢，再加上這個周末的身體狀況不是很好，有些意興闌珊。距離壁畫完成的期限只剩一個月不到，所以我身邊神秘的鄰居紛紛出現。雖然我原先預想的是熱鬧的夏日派對，不過大家都很專注，想盡快把作品完成，所以空氣中反而有股很緊張的氣氛。

The temperature keeps soaring in August. Besides, I was not in very good shape last weekend, so I didn't appear to be as cheery as the past month. There is less than one month away from the deadline, so I got to see all my mysterious neighbors. I had expected a merry summer party, but everyone so intended to finish their work. I sniffed some nervous air and was influenced by it.

四月投稿之前，我只有滿腔的熱情，雖然活了將近三十二年，敝人完全沒有畫大型壁畫的經驗，所以便天馬行空地把底圖的上部塞滿了美麗的花朵。等到實地作業之際才明瞭，聰明人是不會這麼做的。因此，我有一半以上的時間都在鷹架上生活，反觀隔壁的美少女團體，居然在一天內就完成了作品，而且圖的重心就放在中心點，這時要捶胸頓足真是來不及了。

Before I submitted the picture in April, I had nothing but passion. I am going to turn 32 soon, but I didn't have any experience of painting on such a large scale before this summer. I just followed my whim and stuffed the top of my picture with beautiful flowers. It was not until last month that I realized that a wise artist wouldn't do that. So this explained why I have to spend more than half of the time up there on the scaffolods. My neighbors, a group of young juicy gals, took only one day to finish their work. The focus of their picture is right in the middle. Sigh, it was late for me to moan and groan...

接著對面的年輕姐妹花也出現了，她們也面臨了爬鷹架的命運，妹妹不過是即將升高二的小妞，居然在五分鐘之內就克服恐懼，爬到最高層，而且似乎沒有甚麼害怕的感覺，原本敝人還想提供一些精神上的協助，卻發現我的好意真是多餘，我只能在對面，很汗顏地想著，我還花了一兩個小時呢！真不曉得我多活的十五年是幹甚麼用的。

Then the sisters who are responsible for the space across from mine appeared. They were confronted by the fate of climbing the scaffolds as well. The younger sister is about 16 to 17 years old, but she conquered her fear within 5 minutes and got to the top. I couldn't sense any fear in her. Well, I had even wanted to offer her some mental help! My good will wasn't necessary after all. I could only sit on my bench and recall it had taken me one to two hours, and even some invisible tears. I wondered what my extra fifteen years of living on earth were for.

到了第二天，體能有些不堪負荷，我的筆觸就更狂野了，因為始終無法走精工路線，本來我已印象派自居，但是後來我覺得應該比較偏向野獸派。薛吉一直很感人地安慰我，加了小白人之後，畫面開始生氣勃勃，我居然很掃興地回答，其實我已經記不得當初自己到底要畫甚麼，我只想趕快畫完，把東西收收，回家過安全的人生。

The second day, the heat and my fatigue really beat me. It was all shown in my wild brushstroke. I am no good at creating fine lines, so I prided myself on my Impressionist style. Later I found "Fauvism" would be a better definition. Shaggy never stopped encouraging me. She even said, "The little white figures give life to the whole picture!" I gave her a cold look and replied, "I don't remember what they are doing exactly. For the moment, I wish I could wrap up the whole thing right away, pack my stuff, and go home to lead a safe life."

唉，有這麼多可畏的後生，我怎麼可能還輕鬆地躺在家裡呢？就是因為這樣，只好更努力啦！

Alas, with so many young talented people, how am I going to relax at home without any worry? Just because there are so many new tides pushing from the back, I have no choice but to work harder...