My teacher / 老師的老師

江正吉老師繪
by Jim Jiang

上學期上完國畫課之後，有種大徹大悟的感覺，我覺得再怎麼練習，我也不會進步，所以這個學期開始的時候，便斷然地和老師說，人應該要執著於自我的專長，很多事是不能勉強的，本來想就這樣揮揮衣袖離開，結果老師和班長紛紛來勸說，我還記得老師那時的表情，他的臉上有著很包容的微笑，說：「傻孩子，上國畫課是很開心的事，就算只是來看我畫畫也無所謂，因為這兩個小時中，你可以跳脫原來的思考方式，也許因此可以學到新東西，應用在你想創作的方面上。」

After taking Chinese painting class for a semester, I had an epiphany—no matter how hard I practiced, I was not born for it. Therefore, in the beginning of this semester, I told Jim with firm determination that I should focus on what I am good at. With no talent in Chinese painting, I didn't want to force myself. I had intended on stopping the lesson, but Jim and our class leader came to me, trying to change my mind. I still remember how Jim looked then. He wore a magnanimous smile on his face and said, "Silly child. Learning Chinese painting should be fun. Even if you just come and watch me paint, it will still do you good. Within these two hours, you can detach yourself from your old mode of thinking. Perhaps you can even learn something new from me and apply it in the field you are more interested in."

於是，這個學期我到目前為止沒有拿過一次毛筆，幾個月前，我完全無法接受上課之後不做作業，想不到現在我還挺高興的，有時候上課只是和身邊的婆婆媽媽天南地北地哈啦，也不再自我苛責，好像是腦中某個卡住的齒輪被修好了，想法變得開闊許多。

Well, this semester I haven't taken up the brush pen, not even once. A few months ago, I couldn't accept the idea that I didn't do any homework after the class. I wouldn't have imagined that I am so happy now. Sometimes I spend much time chatting away about all with the senior ladies in class, and I've stopped blaming myself for my laziness and distraction. It's like a cog in my brain was stuck. It was fixed at a certain moment and I've become quite broad-minded.

去年秋天一開始上課時，老師說了句很有哲理的話，他說，國畫裡盡是人生的哲學。因為他從中得到諸多體悟，所以我們又從他身上學到第二層的詮釋。有時我為一些芝麻小事要捉狂時，看著老師那樣氣定神閒地畫畫，不禁自問，如果是老師，會如何看待同樣的問題，即使我不知道他的反應，我很確定的是，他不會因此大發雷霆，這樣想之後，我也想要他的平靜自若，自然就會朝比較平和的方向去找解決的方法。

Last autumn when I first started, Jim said something very philosophical. He said that one can learn about life in Chinese painting. He interpreted the life philosophy according to his own experiences, and we benefited so much from his wise words. Sometimes when I am about to lose my temper because of certain trivial things, Jim's poise make me ask myself how he would solve the problem if he were in my shoes. I don't know the answer, but I am sure that he wouldn't fly into a rage. I want his calm badly and that leads me toward a more peaceful way of thinking.

有時我太專注於畫畫，把所有重心往上面放，前幾天有些苦惱時，聽到老師說，畫畫不是全部，生活裡還有其他事，像親人等等，連老師一輩子從事美術，卻還說，畫畫只是為了增添生活情趣，我感動於他謙卑的態度。不過也對，如果生活裡沒有和別人互動，沒有一些責任和義務，我可能就不會那麼珍惜畫畫帶來的快樂自在。我本來也都清楚這個道理，可是怎麼活著活著就忘了‧‧‧

Sometimes I concentrate too much on painting and have the idea that it is the only thing that matters in my life. A few days ago when I was kind of upset, Jim happened to say that painting isn't everything. There are other important things and people such as taking care of our family. I was very touched by his humble attitude. Jim has been working in the art field for more than 3 decades, he still believes that painting is mainly for making life more interesting. In fact, if there were no interaction with other people and responsibilities, I wouldn't cherish the joy of painting. I knew this too, but sometimes we forget as we move ahead...

這個週末和四年沒有見面的Florence重逢，她說，我比年少的時候豁然開朗，我想那是因為身邊許多人教我如何生活，老師也需要老師啊！

This weekend I had a reunion with Florence, whom I hadn't seen for four years. She said that I am so much more mature and at ease than before. That's because many people around me have been teaching me how to live well. You know, even teachers need teachers!