non-passer-by / 非旁觀者

小時候被爸爸媽媽處罰的時候，我最大的心願就是希望自己是旁邊偷笑的弟弟，我羨慕旁觀者無事一身的輕盈。

My biggest wish, when punished by parents in childhood, was to become my younger brother, who gloated aside over my bad luck. How I envied his incomparable lightness...

一個人成年定型的樣子，其實累積成長路上各種奇奇怪怪的小創傷導致的影響，我的旁觀者情節似乎成為我的一部份，在許多事件裡，我希望保持超然的地位，只用我的雙眼冷靜觀察周遭的風暴，我盡量避免被情緒捲著、拖著，雖然我並不總是如此理性，當我無法超越情感時，與其對造成憤怒或傷心的痛苦源生氣，我更對自己失望。

The way a grown-up is, accumulates the after-effects of all kinds of trauma he has encountered since birth. My passer-by complex has become part of me. In many incidents, I do my best to stay detached. I observe stories that go on around me with calm. I avoided being pulled and dragged by irrational feeling. Well, I am not always rational. When I can't rise above emotion, I am disappointed not so much with the origin that causes my fury or sadness but with myself.

最近身邊刮起太多太強的大風浪，我很想只當旁觀者，但是我不想變得漠然，這對我來說，是人生的極惡。當我摸索尋找優雅的退場方式，凋謝的玫瑰提醒我，不管人生多複雜，還是躲不了綻放、枯萎的定律，既然我們無論如何都得前進，那就帶著勇氣和體諒吧！

A lot of emotional storms have howled and roared in my seemingly quiet life. I want very much to be just the passer-by, but I don't want to turn into someone indifferent. That to me, is the ultimate evil. When I am groping for an elegant way to exit the scene or bring a peaceful end, the withered rose says: No matter how complicated life is, it always follows the rule of blossoming and dying. Since we have to move forward anyway, then let's do it with courage and an understanding heart...

our third Valentine / 第三個情人節

LOVE by Weichuen You

Why do swans have sweet love?

Why do polar bears have warm love?

Mama, why am I ALL alone? It's not unfair!

Mama says, "You are loved by all the world! Love comes in so many forms. Pay attention!"

"Mama's love is like an elephant. She lifts you up with a firm foothold. "

"And she makes you swing in the air!"

"Daddy is a hippo. He takes great care of you."

"More, he dreams with you in the water."

"Grandpa is a fierce lion. He protects you, adores you without spoiling you."

"Grandma loves you in the way a hen loves her chicks. You are always the first thing in her mind."

"The aunties are passionate scorpios. When they are around you, no meanie dare come near."

"Big sis follows you. She is your faithful friend."

Wow, so many people love me!

Maybe a little too much!

"Just give it back!"

How do I love? Like the happy bird that takes everyone on a flight?

Or like the naughty cat that amuses everyone?

Or like the tame rabbit that pleases everyone?

Or can I love like the furry sheep that warms everyone?

Mama says, "As long as you are sincere, the world will get to feel your love!"

自從上個學期，我整個人變得很神經質，本來工作都是到最後一刻才會完成的，現在居然在數個星期前就準備好，想不到我連情人節也要提前數周慶祝？其實是上週帶去南投的MUJI素描本被我原封不動帶回來，看到空白的紙，我心裡有些過意不去，就拿來替小方寫個故事吧。我家的小子轉眼間已經兩歲半，遲早有一天，他會問我們有關愛的問題，我想不出來比圖畫書更棒的回答方式。

Since last semester, I have become quite neurotic. I used to be the kind of person that didn't have work finished until the last minute. Now I've totally transformed into a total stranger who makes preparation weeks ahead of the due date. I am even going to extend this "good" habit to the celebration of Valentine's Day? The truth is, the MUJI sketchbook I took with me to Nanto, central Taiwan, last week remained blank even after the trip. I felt sorta guilty on seeing the boundless white, so I might as well write a story for Von. The apple of our eye is 2 and half years old. Sooner or later, he'll pose questions about love. I can't figure out a better form of answers than picture books.

感謝筆友Caterina的信封，本來只是無意間翻閱去年一整年的信件，突然發現她的信封顏色、字跡和郵票可以創造出不錯的視覺效果。如果把這本小書的素材所花費的飛行里程數加起來，是來回韓國、日本和單程義大利飛台灣的機票錢，想來挺驚人的！

I'd like to thank my pal Caterina for her envelopes. I was just thumbing through the mail I had received last year, and it suddenly occurred to me the color of her envelopes, her handwriting and stamps might create an impressive visual effect. If I count the mileage of getting the materials for making this little book, it'll be round trips from Taiwan to Korea, from Taiwan to Japan and a single trip from Italy to Taiwan. Isn't it amazing...

Sorrow Jei / 傑哥

我在工作桌的窗前放了幾張便利貼，用來自我鼓勵，昨天坐在桌前想新故事時，發現我隨手寫的加油兩字下面，多了用鉛筆寫的英文版，雖然我強烈懷疑是傑哥的字跡，我還是先就家中現有的成員進行調查，大家都一副不知情狀，我就更覺得原犯是傑哥了。

I put up some Post-it notes on the window in front of my art table for self-encouragement. Yesterday when I sat there thinking about my new story, I found the pencil-written English version below my two Chinese words. I strongly suspected it was Jei's handwriting. Despite my doubt, I conducted a preliminary investigation among my current family members in the apartment. Everyone seemed unaware of the whole thing. That only enhanced my original suspicion.

傑哥其實是我弟弟，因為小時候他抗議我有「姊姊」這個令人尊敬且親愛的稱呼，而身為弟弟，大家都以全名喚他，他深切地感到不公平，於是我們贈與他「哥」字輩的新綽號。叫久了，慢慢也有種感覺，傑哥在某些時候很像是我哥哥。

Elder Bro Jei is actually my younger brother. When he was little, one day he protested that as the older sister, everyone called me with the respectable and dear term. However, as the younger brother, we sometimes called him by his full name. He firmly believed that it was unfair, so we gave him the nickname with the term "elder brother." Gradually, I had the feeling that Jei is my elder brother in some ways.

傑哥就要轉三十歲，雖然他依舊幼稚搞笑，可是和以前是不太一樣了，應該是長大許多。我要把這個出自於不知名動機的小禮物，回送給傑哥，作為他沒有家人陪伴的護身符。

Jei is about to turn 30. He is always childish and funny, but he is different from what he used to be. I think he has matured. I am going to give Jei this small gift in return--the two words which were written by him out of unknown motives, as the talisman that'll protect him when he is far away from us.

生日快樂，送給黯然銷魂的傑！

Happy birthday to Sorrow Jei!

Ice and fire / 冰與火

flowers / 花兒

the gift II / 禮物 II

年終了，雖然想默默地度過，不過回家的時候心裡頭還是會有小小的期待，希望在信箱裡能撿到問候的明信片。果然，上帝聽到我的祈禱，我在2008年的最後一個星期收到許多溫暖的祝福，幾乎都是來自三禮的小朋友。

It was the end of another year. I didn’t plan anything outrageous. Still, when I went home, my heart rippled with unspoken expectations. I’d love to accidentally find in my mailbox greeting postcards. God must have heard my inner monologue because I did receive many warm best wishes, which were mostly from the past class.

即使新的學期開始又要結束，我老是想到之前一起生活的片段，認識你們是我的工作中最棒的事情之一，謝謝妳們把有關我的回憶帶在身邊，我也是如此想著妳們。

Even though the new semester began and is about to end, I’ve always recalled the fragments of our life together. It is certainly one of the most beautiful encounters at work. Thank you for carrying the memories about me with you. That’s also how I remember you.

薛吉說，我用一種神祕又溫暖的方式，關心著別人，好像很久沒有使用這個獨門絕技了，因為被你感動，我寫了一個故事，送給親愛的你。

Shaggy said that I have a mysterious and heart-warming way of caring about others. To be honest, I’ve not used this talent for a while. Because I was deeply moved by you, I wrote a story for my dear you.

我的夢想書

My Dream Book

有時候不知不覺地，我便忘記了自己的夢想。

Sometimes I just forget my dream when I move along.

或者，我停滯不前。

Or I get stuck in the middle of nowhere.

這些時候，夢想離我好遙遠。

At these moments, my dream is so far away from me.

可是，親愛的你捎來一封信。

Then there'd come a letter from my dear.

你說，你翻山越嶺，完成了不可能的任務，在奮力向前的同時，想到了我，如果我和妳同行，一定也會有美妙的體會。

You say, you've conquered hills and mountains, achieving your mission impossible. When you scramble upwards, you think of me. If I were there with you, I'd feel equally touched by the power of life.

接著，我收到另一封信。

One more letter comes.

你說，你很想念我，我的心因此暖烘烘的，像剛出爐的熱麵包。

You say, you miss me a lot. My heart is thus warmed, like the bread right out of the baking oven.

我又收到一封信。

I receive another letter.

你說，你渴望夢想，就像人們渴望著陽光。

You say, you desire your dream, like people desire sunshine.

另一封給我的信。

Still another letter for me.

你說，你羨慕其他人勇敢地在外太空飛翔。

You say, you envy others for flying to other planets with plenty of courage.

你也想要那麼勇敢，但總是差一步。

You want to be that brave, but you need to take one more step forward.

信件如雪花般飛來，把我淹沒了。

I am drowned in piles of letters that come from all directions.

我偷偷準備了一個神秘禮物，要送給你、你、還有你。

I prepare a secret gift for you, you and you.

啊，秘密曝光了！

Oops, my secret is revealed!

我想對你說，我已經想像過千百次我們共同的旅程，還有我在一旁嘮叨，你也聽到了吧？

I'd like to say to you, I've imagined thousands of times our journey together. I am even there nagging at you. You must have heard it...

你在想我的同時，我也想著妳燦爛的笑容。

When you miss me, I miss your dazzling smile too.

因為你，我也像緊抓著陽光般地抓住夢想。

Because of you, I hold tight onto my dream, like I never let go of sunshine.

如果你離夢想只有一步的距離，我會在後面推你一把。

And if you are only one step close to your dream, I will give you a thrust from behind.

就像你一直一直在背後支持我和我的夢想一樣‧‧‧

It's exactly how you've always supported me and my dream, even when you don't say anything...