the meaning of traveling / 旅行的意義

圖攝於日本小豆島二十四瞳之映畫村

photo taken in the movie village of 24 eyes, Shoudoshima, Japan

這個學年過了之後，心被鎖在教室裡的某個角落，我不知怎麼地，失去過往的怡然自得，陷入庸人自擾的泥沼裡，最後連想要爬出來的慾望都沿路遺失了。於是當同事嚷嚷著年度旅行的計畫時，我只是很安靜地處理工作上的瑣事，一副事不關己，連自己都搞不清楚究竟是低調還是冷漠。

After this school year, I had a feeling that my heart was locked somewhere in the classroom. Somehow I lost my poise along the way, trapped in self-worry. I even couldn't find the desire to get out. So when my colleagues talked about their annual travel plans with excitement, I buried myself in the trifles at work quietly, as if I didn't plan to go anywhere. I couldn't understand if I was being low-key or indifferent.

圖攝於高知 Los Hotel

photo taken at Los Hotel, Kochi, Japan

「去旅行真的會不同嗎？」我自問，還好，我還是帶著小小的期望去了四國。雖然地點選的冷門，所到之處旅客寥寥無幾，今年的年度旅行看起來就像以往一樣，我無法避免地搭錯車、走錯路、甚至還遇到颱風來襲，所有可以預期和預期以外的偶發事件都發生了，但是這些經歷都讓我跳脫了日常生活的窠臼，我在當地的上班族臉上看到自己的倦容，在別人的生活裡看到自己的擔憂和害怕是多麼的沒有意義，以及他們認真對待每一天的態度，在大自然的美麗中看到生命的力量，還有在我們小小的和室房間，從窗子朝外看到暴風雨過後的藍天。

"Would traveling make any difference?" I asked myself. Well, I still went on the trip planned in advance to Shikoku, Japan. Different from the past, I chose a low-profile destination where only a handful of tourists could be seen. Yet like before, I couldn't help taking wrong buses, getting lost. We even bumped into a typhoon. Our trip was enriched by what could and could not be expected. They might not always be pleasant, but these experiences took me out of the narrow frame of the reality. I saw myself on the tired look of the office workers. By traveling I took a glimpse into others' lives, so touched by their serious attitude toward life. I also realized how pointless my fear and worries were. I witnessed the strength of life in the beautiful nature. Out of the window in our small Japanese room, I saw the blue sky after the storm.

兩個星期過後，我看到新的自己，不是百分之百的勇敢，但是不想逃避，也不想改變自己敷衍了事，只想把持我的信仰，找到答案。你問我旅行的意義為何，我不再用語言敘述了，如果你夠敏感，從我身上你就可以找到端倪。

Two weeks later, I saw a brand-new me. I am not 100% brave, but I do not want to run away anymore. Nor will I change myself to cater to others. I want to hold onto my beliefs and find the answers I am looking for. You asked me the meaning of traveling. Languages seem extra. If you are sensitive enough, you'll find them in me.