Saturday, April 11, 2015

temporary failure / 暫時的失敗


過了腳步錯亂的一週,終於收到結果,雖然很認真準備「香蕉男孩」,居然連入圍都沒有,今天想起來還覺得是件有趣的事。

After a chaotic week, I've finally received the letter from the publisher Hsin-y. Though it took me nine months to prepare the book The Banana Boy, my work isn't even shortlisted. As a matter of fact, I find it to be rather intriguing after cooling down. 

        因為沒有太多時間難過,沮喪一個晚上之後,我邊回顧過去一年學到的東西,邊自我檢討,然後許多人生片刻就像潮汐般湧進腦中。

     As I don't have much time to lament over my failure, I allowed myself only an evening to get over the feeling of frustration. While I am looking back on what I've learned over the past year,  numerous past moments flash into my mind. 



        首先想到這週去上柯倩華老師的繪本課,她一直強調要化繁為簡,但是「香蕉男孩」裡有太多條故事線,我想這應該是其中一個原因。我想到自己以前走的風格以簡單扼要為主,可是在學習的過程中過度飽和,很想來個大逆轉,沒有掌握好反而走了極端,故事裡還有故事,背景裡還塞了細節。

     First, I recall what Mr. Ko, the lecturer of a picture book class I've started to attend this week, says about SIMPLIFYING everything. I bet one of the problems about The Banana Boy is that there are too many story lines. I then think of my past works which are done in my characteristic simple style. However, I've learned so much over the past year that I want to cram a lot of ideas into the book. This time my story and illustrations are full of too many details. 

        我不得不想到在英國學習的經驗,每當我過度努力時,就忘了放鬆,最後便失去了自己,我還記得老師看著我的圖說:這不是你。感覺像同樣的故事上演;而且現在的我過度想贏,無法一直把焦點放在輕鬆玩樂上,此時我便無法自在灑脫,有可能線條因此失去了生命。

     This morning I can't help thinking of my learning experiences in the UK. Every time when I overworked, I forgot to relax and eventually ended up feeling lost. I still remember my instructor Lou saying to me when going over my pictures: This is not you. Now it feels like the same story is being replayed. I also feel that I want to win so much now that I can't focus on having fun all the time. Then of course I can't relax, and it follows that my lines have lost freshness. 

        仔細想想,每次被說是不錯的作品都是要交稿前趕出來的,我得對自己好一點啊!與其加一點油,我應該放一點油!

     It occurs to me my good works are usually produced before the deadline. Maybe I should learn to be nice to myself in the first place. Instead of further pushing myself, I should let it go! 

        唯一不好意思的就是沒法對楷維交代,不過既然是這樣,就再畫一本楷維的書吧!

     I feel bad about not being able to make Kai's dream come true for the time being. But I do have a solution, that is, I'll revise or draw a new book for Kai!

5 comments:

susu said...

噢噢真是可惜! 可以想像你一定是付出好多心血...

不過這樣香蕉男孩就有續集了 :)

Grace Tan said...

雖然這次沒有入圍得獎,但是有我這個非常喜歡妳的故事的讀者/粉絲!我感受到了你線條裡濃濃的用心,見到了可愛的楷維,還聽見了你說故事的語氣。

我引頸期盼你下一本更自在揮灑的繪本喔!

Weichuen You said...

Susu:對啊,最近幾天想想的確是有很多可以修改的地方。

豆豆:好的好的,立馬要振作了!

Shorty修替他娘 said...

那我不說加油
我說放輕鬆
楷維應該會很開心
他的故事有part 2

Weichuen You said...

對啊,可以用這個藉口常常把二哥叫來玩。