I might love you / 我可能會愛你

開學進入第三週，每個週五都走到有點無法呼吸的地步，每個週末都在自我反省，每天早上出門前都要先畫速寫靜心。

This is the third week after the new semester started. Every day I feel kind of suffocated. Every weekend I look back on the week to see how I can do better. Every morning before going to work I have to spend 10 minutes drawing to calm my mind. 

雖然上一個班花了一年才接受小野獸的樣子，我沒有另外一個一年了。昨天我居然有點被打動，即使回到家又是身心俱疲。

It took me a year to love my ex-students as they are, but now I don't have another year. Yesterday at a point I was moved by some really nice girls, though I was as tired as a dog after work. 

我不要再苦惱了，想我要怎麼樣才能教好你，只要你讓我用的方式，我想我可能會愛你。

I don't want to worry anymore, not about how I can turn into the kind of people I expect. Just let me be me, and I might love you. 

Time will tell. / 讓時間說真話。

美術課，學生沒有出現。我坐在書桌前把這幾週的生活真諦畫下來：讓時間說真話。

In my art class today, my students do not show up. I am sitting at the desk drawing a major life lesson God has been reviewing for me for the past few weeks in every way: Time will tell. 

Four Dinosaurs in London / 倫敦四兄弟

在倫敦的時候很寂寞，因為渴望被了解，卻又明白那是不太容易滿足的想望，回家之後終於可以讓寂寞沈澱，把當時的情緒轉成畫面。

I was lonely in London. I desired to be understood, but meanwhile I knew it was a lofty wish. After coming home, I could finally face my loneliness and turn it into images. 

想在倫敦生活的四隻恐龍也有同樣的愛的需求吧！

My four dinosaurs, who dream of finding a place in London, also have the same need for love...

Greetings / 問候

好久沒畫明信片，今天一口氣把心裡的問候都畫出來。

I hadn't hand-drawn postcards for a long while. Today I turned all my greetings into images...

36

今天是三十六歲的第一天，早上和太陽一起醒來，看著窗外映進來的陽光，我知道今天會和我一樣又溫暖又明亮。

Today is the first day of the 36th year in my life. I woke up in the morning with the sun. Seeing the orange light reflected from outside, I know that today will be as warm and bright as me.

如果說每一歲生日都有個主題，對我來說今年是感恩的一年。從倫敦回來之後，到處遇見的人們一直讓我知道我有多美好的人生，我有很疼愛我的家人和好友；我有兩個超可愛的寵物男孩；我有實現夢想的勇氣；我有成長的動力；我有好玩的工作；我有最愛的熱情；我有愛人的能力，所以在生日前我很努力把我所擁有的給出去。

If there is a theme for every birthday, for me, this year it is gratitude. Since coming back from London, people I run into everywhere have constantly reminded me what a beautiful life I have. I have a very loving family and friends, two super adorable pet boys, the courage to fulfill my dream, the motivation to change for the better, a fantastic job, passion for drawing and most of all, the ability to love. Thus, I set the goal to pay it all forward before my birthday. 

我請男孩們幫我畫生日卡，我們邊畫圖邊唱歌，從英文的「我的愛永不變」到法文的小王子主題曲到義大利文的「你想當美國人」，最後索幸跳下椅子跳舞，一面重複著l'americano，楷維幫我畫蛋糕畫到很累，還要深呼吸，最後我和他開玩笑說：汪達姨很苦命耶，哪有人畫自己的生日蛋糕的？

I asked the boys to draw birthday cards for me. We drew and sang, from George Benson's Nothing's Gonna Change My Love for You in English to De Planete en Planete, the theme song for the cartoon The Little Prince in French, to Tu Vuo Fa L'Americano in Italian. In the end we all jumped from our chairs to swing, repeating the word l'americano like mad. Kai was so exhausted from drawing my cake that he had to take a deep breath from time to time. I joked with him, "Auntie Wanda feels very bitter about having to draw her own birthday cake." 

思維說要畫一隻馬，他不在時小馬可以陪我，結果他把馬畫成恐龍了，思維還不會寫國字，所以我們倆合力寫下他對我的祝福。

Von said he wanted to draw a horse, which can accompany me when he is not around. In the end the horse turned out to be a dinosaur. Von hasn't learned how to write Chinese characters yet, so we two wrote together down his best wishes for me. 

謝謝很多小天使，送給我真摯的問候，我很幸福。

I also want to thank many guardian angels of mine for their sincere greetings. I know I am so blessed...

Wanda's art class 12 / 汪達的美術課 12

不知道從什麼時候開始，汪達收集越來越多的處女座朋友，所以從八月底沿路到九月，我們的美術課生日卡業務相當蓬勃，不過因為我也是難搞的處女座，當然是VIP級的家人和友人才能得到我們的手繪卡。

I have no clue since when I have collected more and more Virgo friends, so since the end of August, we have been rather busy making birthday cards in our evening art class. However, since I am also one of the difficult Virgo babies, only our VIP family and friends can have the privilege to get our handmade cards. 

薛吉姐姐收到這兩張卡片時都快哭了，這些線條不能被複製，孩子們一直長大，它們紀錄了男孩們童稚的真心。

When Shaggy received these two cards, she was on the brink of tears. True, as the boys grow up at a light year speed, these lines record their best wishes of a specific moment. They can't be replicated. 

接下來要為男孩們的阿嬤畫卡片，小方畫了有翅膀的外婆，我們在她生日的前一晚把卡片快遞到她心裡。

Next the boys drew cards for their granny. Von drew a lovely grandma with wings. We sent the cards to her heart on the night before her birthday. 

那誰來當我的小天使呢？

Who is going to be my guardian angel? 

Wanda's art class 11 / 汪達的美術課 11

我再一次想到裘蒂皮考特的話：我們愛的人每天會給我們帶來驚喜。

Jodi Picoult's words occur to me one more time: People we love surprise us every day. 

Wanda's art class 10 / 汪達的美術課 10

每天我會在美術課問小方的學校生活，他是個深情的小男生，下課總要和幼稚園的老朋友玩在一起，還要繞到喜歡的女生教室和他說話，不過他說：不知道為什麼，她一看到我就跑走，好幾天這樣了。想不到小方在六歲就遇到這麼棘手的問題，我說：她應該是害羞啦，你要不要也去交新朋友呢？他們也可能是很好的人喔！小方堅持還是喜歡舊朋友。

Every day in our art class, I will ask Von about his school life. He's a faithful little boy, always hanging out with his old friends from the kindergarten during the break. It's also a routine for him to visit the little girl whom he has a crush on, but he says, "I don't know why, but for several days when she sees me, she just runs away." I can't imagine that Von has already encountered such a thorny problem at the age of six. I reply, "I bet she must be shy. Why don't you go make some new friends? They might turn out to be really nice people." However, Von insists on spending time with his old pals. 

說完那席話後我很後悔，反正人最後都會學到如何隱藏感情，最終都會戴上面具，很多人心靈也會扭曲，為什麼我要教一個六歲的小孩溫柔敦厚，或者是給喜歡的人留點空間？小方的六歲就是因為他真摯不隱瞞的感情而美好啊！

I actually regret after uttering out these words. If we, eventually, will master the art of hiding our feelings, or put on masks, why do I teach a six-year-old to be emotionally considerate and magnanimous or give space to someone he likes? Von's sixth year is beautiful right because of his sincere and honest feelings. 

晚上九點的美術課，沒有人需要心理治療師，讓我們每個人都做自己，那樣自由又奔放。

9 p.m. in the evening art class, no one needs any psychotherapist. Let us all be ourselves, so free and careless...

Wanda's art class 9 / 汪達的美術課 9

六歲的小方漸漸社會化，好處是對於生活有越來越多寫實的認知，三歲的楷維還沒有上學，有無限天真的想像力，每天和他說話是我最開心的時刻。

The six-year-old Von is getting better socialized. On the up side, he has a very good understanding of the real life. The three-year-old Kai hasn't gone to school. His wild imagination gives me so much joy whenever I talk to him every day.

上週末染了一頭紅髮，第二天早上抱起楷維說早安，他說：好好看的顏色！小孩的世界裡除了大人訂的規矩，沒有什麼是不可以的。

I had my hair dyed red last weekend. When I held Kai in my arms for saying good morning the following day, he exclaimed, "What a beautiful color!" In children's world, except the rules imposed by adults, nothing is impossible.

所以誰說年輕就是黑髮，而老年就是白髮呢？你要什麼顏色是要靠自己活出來的。

So who says black hair stands for youth while gray hair is a symbol of old age? You can decide your color, and you are the person that has to live it out!

Breakfast on Sunday / 星期天的早餐

星期天的早餐，我用相機紀錄不想吃飯的思維，在一陣甩髮舞之後，面對鏡頭還是擺出專業的姿勢。

Breakfast time on Sunday. I record Von's unwillingness to eat. After a fit of hair-shaking dance, he still poses professionally for me. 

楷維難得吃得很認真。

Kai, to my surprise, takes eating seriously today.